About 4 years ago now, I was caught in the midst of huge turmoil. Betrayal, hurt, feeling like God was not fulfilling His promises to me. I felt like I was a “good” person. So why was this happening to me?!
People that were dear to me and whom I loved betrayed me. I felt lost. I lost friendships. I allowed the enemy to attack and nearly ended my life. Yep, you read that right. I struggled with a life of depression and hid it because I was ashamed of the part of my very being. I felt like being a child of God & depression do not align. Somewhere along my journey, I was criticized and it stuck with me to ‘never let people know you suffer’ from depression because they’ll deem you “unfit, crazy, they will judge you, they’ll leave you, etc” .
Then one day, after a trip to Cancun (thanks Sis) and just taking in all the beauty of Gods marvelous works, it clicked. It clicked as I was telling those of my trip.
One day, while in Cancun, we went snorkeling and I remember vividly being terrified to jump in as they cast the anchor. We were with guides. They had been in this place 1000 times. The beauty and wonder of what was beneath the surface was far greater than I imagined. However, if I did not jump I’d never see it. So I did. With all my might and all my hope I jumped.
The beauty of the underwater museum could never be described in words. The awe and excitement of what was seen would stay with me forever. However the one thing that stuck in that moment and from that moment on was a Bible verse. Hebrews 6:19.
I was at a very hard place in my life and when I heard God speak these words to me I came home and really tried to understand what it all meant. The verse reads “We have this HOPE as an anchor for the SOUL, firm and secure.”
I think back to then I even changed my IG to @anchored.hope. This is where the journey of “This is my Walk” began. I began holding onto hope and using it as anchor to keep me firmly planted in His word. It has been the constant reminder that although the world around me is uncertain, He is a God that holds you in the storm, when the waves around you may be crashing. An anchor is fixed and cannot be removed. The hope He offers is isn’t wishful thinking but based on truth and reality.
This passage in my devotional came on March 9. The day I received this. I opened it and it read “We have hope for today as well as hope for the future because Jesus came, lived a sin-free life, died in our place, and beat death by resurrecting. That historical fact cannot be refuted.”
I knew when I laid down last night and opened the devotional it was a word from Him, that He was and is and is to come. That He is the anchor of my soul, that my walk is solely my own and with Him beside me I’m anchored and safe.
My prayer for you is that you remember He is your hope. When life and emotions become a storm.